The Late Show with Stephen Colbert and guest Laura Benanti during Monday’s March 3, 2025 show. (Photo by Scott Kowalchyk/CBS via Getty Images)
It was supposed to be a cosy, glittery, family-friendly holiday warm-up on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. Fake snow, twinkling lights, festive cheer — the usual American Christmas TV sugar rush.
Instead, viewers got the most unhinged, deliciously savage Christmas meltdown ever broadcast, courtesy of Melania Trump impersonator Laura Benanti, who stormed back onto the show and immediately lit the studio up like a Christmas tree wired to a faulty nuclear reactor.
And the first words out of her mouth?
“I don’t give a damn about Christmas! Trees, gifts, cookies — all a conspiracy to make me fake-smile!”
Colbert froze.
The audience shrieked.
Social media instantly combusted.
Welcome to the Christmas Apocalypse, Melania-style.
THE RETURN OF MELANIA 2.0 — AND THIS TIME SHE’S DONE PRETENDING
Benanti, a Tony Award-winning actress and seasoned Melania doppelgänger, strutted onto Colbert’s stage in what can only be described as weaponised glamour: sculpted hair, icy pout, the aura of someone who hasn’t sincerely smiled since 2006.
She’s been Colbert’s unofficial First Lady-in-Residence for nearly a decade, parodying Melania Trump with surgical precision. But on this particular night, she dialed the chaos up to 11.
Her mission?
To convince America she loves Christmas.
Her method?
A deadpan confession so sharp it could slice a gingerbread house in half.
“I love Christmas the same way I love my husband,” she purred.
“Once a year.”
The crowd exploded. Colbert nearly fell off his chair.
But the real show was only beginning.
A THROWBACK TO THE REAL-LIFE SCANDAL THAT STARTED IT ALL
America hasn’t forgotten Melania’s infamous 2018 moment — the leaked audio that shattered the First Lady’s carefully curated holiday aesthetic.
“I’m working my a– off on the Christmas stuff… who gives a f*** about the Christmas stuff and decorations?”
It was the line that launched a thousand memes, think pieces, and late-night monologues.
Benanti revived the quote with the theatrical glee of someone unwrapping a gift labeled PURE CHAOS.
She held up a bright red ornament, emblazoned with the legendary sentence.
“You can commemorate the moment I said that,” she announced in her flawless Melania voice,
“with this official ‘Melania who gives a f about Christmas stuff and decorations’* ornament. Available for just ninety-nine ninety-nine… ninety-nine.”**
The price was so absurd the audience collectively choked.
Moments later, she offered what she called “the perfect stocking stuffer” — a handful of rubble supposedly from the White House’s East Wing.
Even Colbert couldn’t keep a straight face.
THE DECOR WARS — MELANIA VS CHRISTMAS, ROUND FOUR
Benanti’s performance didn’t just revive Melania’s old sound bites. She also took savage aim at the former First Lady’s actual Christmas decorations — which have been the subject of national debate, internet hysteria, and countless memes.
Who could forget the bone-white hallway of nightmare trees that looked like something out of a dystopian snow-drenched horror film? Or the blood-red forest that resembled a festive reenactment of The Shining?
Benanti didn’t let any of it slide.
Her icy, slow burn delivery seemed to mock the entire aesthetic catalog of Melania’s tenure:
the sterile white, the exaggerated opulence, the kind of design choices that make you wonder whether Christmas had wronged her personally.
THE HOSPITAL READING CLIP THAT MELTED THE INTERNET
Just when viewers thought Benanti had exhausted every satirical weapon in her arsenal, she pulled out one more.
Melania’s much-mocked visit to the Children’s National Hospital — where she delivered a reading of a Santa-themed book with all the warmth of a malfunctioning robot — became Benanti’s next target.
Dressed in a sleek black pantsuit that perfectly mirrored Melania’s original outfit, she reenacted the reading with exaggerated monotone precision, while a voiceover of Melania’s real words played in the background.
“Does Santa see in the dark?” the First Lady’s voice asked.
“Does he wear night vision goggles?”
The caption Colbert’s team slapped on the Instagram post said it all:
“How the FLOTUS stole Christmas.”
Instant classic.
A NEAR-PERFECT MELANIA — AND THE WOMAN BEHIND THE SATIRE SPEAKS OUT
Benanti’s portrayal was almost unnervingly accurate — too accurate, some would say. After all, she’s been studying Melania for eight years, mastering the walk, the whisper, the icy micro-glare that suggests a permanent state of existential exhaustion.
And she doesn’t shy away from the darker side of the character she plays.
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In an interview last year, the actress was blunt about her real-life feelings toward Melania Trump — especially while Donald Trump was facing his high-profile hush-money trial.
“Look, I think she has absolutely contributed to some horrendous things,” Benanti said.
“She has perpetuated multiple lies, done horrible things. And also, I think she f*ing hates that guy.”**
Not exactly your standard Hallmark Christmas commentary.
But that’s what makes Benanti’s satire hit so hard.
It’s not just impersonation — it’s commentary wrapped in comedy wrapped in a Swarovski-encrusted snowball of political absurdity.
THE AUDIENCE REACTION — TOTAL COMBUSTION
Every few seconds, a new wave of laughter rolled across the studio.
Some viewers clutched their chest like they were experiencing spiritual revival.
Others wiped tears from their eyes as Benanti’s increasingly unhinged rants turned Christmas tropes into war zones.
Colbert, usually the calm captain of chaos, spent half the segment trying not to scream-laugh into his microphone.
WHY THIS MELANIA MOMENT HIT HARDER THAN EVER
In a year where political satire has often felt exhausted, predictable, or overshadowed by real-life scandals, Benanti’s performance landed like a peppermint-scented meteor.
It reminded audiences of:
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the surreal theatre of the Trump White House
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the bizarre annual guessing game of “What will Melania’s Christmas look like this time?”
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and the lingering cultural fascination with a First Lady who seemed perpetually trapped between apathy, luxury, and existential dread
Benanti distilled all of it into seven minutes of razor-sharp comedy, wrapped in holiday glitter and cynicism.
COLBERT GOT WHAT HE WANTED — A CHRISTMAS EVENT TO REMEMBER
Late-night hosts dream of viral moments that dominate the internet the next morning.
This wasn’t just viral — it was inevitable.
Clips exploded across X, Instagram, TikTok. Within hours, “Melania,” “I don’t give a damn about Christmas,” and “Colbert” were trending worldwide.
Some viewers hailed it as the funniest holiday segment of the year.
Others declared it the most savage Melania takedown since 2018.
Either way, the verdict was clear:
Laura Benanti delivered the Christmas gift of pure, unfiltered chaos — and America couldn’t get enough.
THE FINAL WORD: A MELANIA SATIRE FOR THE HISTORY BOOKS
In an era where politics feels like a year-round fever dream, Laura Benanti has once again proven she is the unofficial ambassador of satirical truth.
By the time she walked off Colbert’s stage — ornament in hand, rubble in purse — viewers were left breathless, delighted, and desperately trying to recover.
And somewhere out there, the real Melania may or may not have rolled her eyes so hard she saw last Christmas.
A holiday miracle, indeed.
